ETF Squared (ETFS), The Next Generation.

I came across the following in a Seeking Alpha article:

The first full week of October brought stock markets a summer flashback; unstable, volatile and with little direction going forward. Though the Dow Jones Industrial Average did near 11,000, it has yet to break through and stay above the milestone for any meaningful period of time. Turbulent equity markets and renewed concerns about inflation paved the way for gold to hit record highs once again, as the yellow metal is now trading well above $1,340 an ounce.

Are you scared yet? Good! But not to worry, the Cavalry is here to rescue you from the Injuns.

The ETF world saw the introduction of several new funds, furthering the 1000+ options that investors have in the exchange traded world.

Now you have 1,000 ETFs that invest in 9,000 securities plus commodities and other assets. Soon there will be more ETFs than underlying assets. How does that help the investor who is now back to square one confused by the diversity of 1,000 choices? ETF Squared (ETFS) - The Next Generation to the rescue, of course. Here is how:

ETF Squared (ETFS) is the next generation of ETFs. An ETFS does not buy stocks and stuff but simple, first generation ETFs. Even if simple ETFs smooth out the volatility of the underlying assets, ETFS smooth out the volatility of simple ETFs to the point that you can sleep soundly with them. ETF Squared (ETFS) don't make waves, they don't make a sound in the night, they don't upset apple carts, they are the perfect sleeping pill. Fill your portfolio with ETF Squared (ETFS) and you'll sleep the rest of your life away in the knowledge that you are not making waves.

You are also not making any money, but WTF, who prefers money over sound sleep?

Should by any chance ETF Squared (ETFS) show any sign of volatility it's time to go to ETF Qubed (ETFQ). ETFQs invest in ETFSs which, in turn, invest in simple, first generation ETFs. After that, the next step is TetraETFs (TETF). Tetra is four in Latin. TETFs are fourth generation ETFs that invest in ETFQs that invest in ETFSs that invest in simple or first generation ETFs. You'll sleep as soundly as a corpse in a grave with TetraETFs!

No wonder that money and its fool are soon parted!

Denny Schlesinger

This Week in ETFs: New Funds, More Investment Options